I'm into week three of my cutting diet and I have to say, this time round it is much harder than last time.
Maybe it is because the kids' half term break was right near the beginning so handing out snacks and making them food just acted as a reminder as to how hungry I was! Or maybe it is because I am actually terrified that I wont be able to get back into shape again. Regardless of the reason, I know that it is a mental battle I have to face but one that sometimes I don't feel I have the energy to fight.
I am desperately keen to stay motivated and get on stage on 3rd May, but I am also struggling to stay motivated as I am scared that I haven't given myself enough time and all this effort will have been a waste. I wish I had have tracked my progress last time so I had something to compare it against because at the moment, I keep comparing it to the final results!
I have less than 10 weeks to go.
That doesn't seem like much time at all! WAAAAH!
I am making progress though, its not all doom and gloom. My body fat is steadily decreasing (thanks to tanita scales for working that out) and I am noticing more muscle definition across all of my body which is great.
My husband is also giving a calorie deficit diet a go which is really helpful because it means that there aren't (as many) "treats" and temptations in the house.
There are plenty of things that mean it should be easier this time round actually which, once again, just proves that it is a mental game. Yes, you need to physically train, but I bet every competitor enjoys that part and it's actually almost a haven in the midst of the day. People often assume that going to the gym and working out is the difficult bit but it really isn't, that's the bit that gives you time with yourself, time to sweat out the frustration, time to work for your next (very desired!) meal.
This cutting malarkey is by far the toughest part of this whole thing, don't get me wrong though, it is hugely rewarding and I do go to bed at night with a great sense of accomplishment and wake up each day with a sense of excitement, knowing that I can eat again, but it is hard work.
Despite all of the above, I do think it is good to push yourself. I think it is really important to make ourselves uncomfortable sometimes and challenge ourselves, both physically and mentally. Forcing myself to do something that is really hard, that causes me to questions my motives (numerous times) yet be able to stick with it, is super exciting. It means that I know my mental resilience is getting stronger. I am able to cope with more stresses, I can trust myself to stick to my goals and aspirations and not succumb to that little voice that repeatedly tries to steer us off track.
So there ya go, that's where I am at right now, just under 10 weeks to go til competition day.
I'll keep ya posted over the next few weeks!